Ahhh the dress. Some might argue its one of the most important decisions a bride must make. Each bride is different, and everyone or every couple have their own ideas as to what they want their wedding day to be like. Some brides want it all. Elegance, extravagance, bejewelled tiaras, and septors. Okay, maybe not septors, but you know what I'm getting at. Others couldn't give a rat's ass. And then there are many inbetween. I haven't decided which bride I am yet, but I'm pretty sure my fiance and friends would say I'm the bride that wants it all. I want perfection. I want my one wedding day to be a day where all of my dreams come to fruition. One of those dreams is to look a true bride. What does that mean? Well, it means different things to different people, and for me it means that I want to look like true beauty. The most beautiful, elegant, and sophistocated I could ever look. My hair, my face, and of course, my dress need to be the pinnacle of what the human mind can concieve as wedding bliss encapsulated and projected onto a woman's body.
Its easy to look at wedding dresses. You flip through the magazine pages, scan website photos, and point your figure at the dresses you love the most on the bulimic model bodies as tall as skyscrapers. Simple. Well, I guess if you have a bulimic skyscraper model body then it is that simple, but most woman don't. Most woman are anything but, so it actually isn't as simple as seeing a dress you like in a photo and thinking that you'll look the same in the same dress. If that were the case, no one would need to go from store to store trying on hundreds of dresses until they found the one. Ever watch 'Say Yes to the Dress' on TLC? They make it look so easy.
Here's my advice from my wedding dress search experience. Some of this won't be new, and most of it will be a reiteration of what many have said in the past.
Keep an Open Mind
Don't trust the pictures in the magazines. You MUST try on a wedding dress. I'm guilty of contemplating at one or two points in my wedding dress search to just buy the dress that I think I love that I saw online. I'm one of those people who are constantly looking through pictures of dresses. I was looking at dresses before I even got engaged. Oh like you don't do it. So when I got engaged, I thought I knew what kind of dress I wanted. I brought this idea that I thought I wanted around with me everywhere. When trying on dresses I kept thinking, "No, I need this certain look. It looks the best. I like it the most." When looking back, I've realized what a blindfold it was. Just holding me back from trying on dresses outside the scope of what I thought I wanted. I don't want to be too desciptive about what I did and didn't like because I don't want to give anything away about my actual dress. So bare with me if you think it sounds like I'm being too vague.
Bridal Salons
Walking into a bridal salon can be very overwhelming at first or second, or even third. There are so many dresses just hanging there, waiting for you to try them on. Keep an open mind, and don't hold yourself down to a certain theme or concept. If you truly want the dress of your dreams, you must be willing to work for it. There are gowns for every body type, and every budget type. You want to go somewhere where they take appointments. This may sound like kind of a bummer, but this is the only way you'll be gaurenteed one on one attention from a bridal consultant. And trust me, it makes a huge difference. Why wouldn't you want the focus of your wedding dress buying experience to be all on you? Its just you, your friends, and an experienced bridal liason to take your words and transform them to something you can put in your body. They are there to help make all your wedding dress dreams come true.
Of course, if you need to look absolutely everwhere, you've got to visit the salons that don't take appointments too. I wouldn't suggest going to a non appointment salon on a weekend. If they don't take appointments, its a zoo.
I visited three salons. S2, Sonia's (the sister store to S2), and Evalina Couture. Here were my experiences at each location:
S2 - Very posh store, with beautiful dresses. It is here, and at Sonia's where you'll find brands like Watters, Lazaro, and Pronovias, just to name a few. I found this place, because it was listed as one of the only places in western Canada to carry any Watters, or Lazaro gowns. They operate by walk-in basis only, and are not open Tuesdays or Sundays. You can imagine why Saturdays are bridezilla Saturdays. Of course there is more staff on a Saturday afternoon, but it can be a bit of a wait of you've got bad timing. That goes for during the week too.
Sonia's - Its that homely little two storey house in Bridgeland that you drive by on Edmonton Trail. It doesn't look like much, but they actually carry some very high end designer gowns there too. Since Sonia's and S2 are sister stores, they share most of their inventory. They only accept walk-in clients as well, so its the same deal as S2.
Evalina Couture - This store is known for carrying the higher end names in bridal fashions, such as Nicole Miller, Melissa Sweet, Badgley Mischka, Priscilla of Boston, and even Claire Pettibone! Another brand her store houses is the infamous and synonamous with all things wedding dress -- Vera Wang. The only store in Alberta to carry Vera Wang, and one of the very few in western Canada. This is an appointment only store. You get one hour with Evalina herself. The store is beautiful. Its got this vintage feel, with rustic furniture, and artistically places racks of dresses, with wall to wall mirrors that stick out from behind the dresses every now again.
There are of course a myriad of other bridal salons in the Calgary area and for me, I didn't need to shop any further, but again I say, each bride is different. All salons carry completely difference dresses, but you're gaurenteed to find what you're looking for if you're willing to look deep into the depths of those racks.
Budget
Don't think that you can't look amazing because you don't have a dress that costs the same as a car or a house. Its ridiculous. Designers know that brides are on budgets, and most have an expensive line and an inexpensive line. What's the difference? Well I read on the Watters website that for their two lines, the difference in price is due to the different materials used. But style is never sacrificed, and if you go to their website, you'll see it first hand. Most of their most beautiful gowns are in the inexpensive line. Even Vera Wang has realized the state of the economy, and had just introduced her White by Vera Wang collection. Its her signature bridal style but at only a fraction of the cost. And when say 'a fraction', I mean a fraction. These dresses range from only $800 to maybe $1300 at the most. Considering most of her gowns from her actual collection start at $5000 and only increase exponentially from there, her White collection will be a steal. Only available at a David's Bridal of course. I think the closest David's Bridal to us will be in Spokane Washington. There might be a few opening up out in eastern Canada too.
You Can Get That Expensive Gown!
What could I be possibly talking about? I was just ranting for the last several paragraphs about how you don't need to spend a gazillion dollars on a wedding dress. And my previous statements still hold. You don't. But, there's a way in which you can, if you really really really are dying for that dream Vera Wang-esque gown. There are two options (that I am aware of) to do so:
1) Ever thought of selling your wedding dress after your wedding day? Well you should if you want that expensive gown. I understand that there is a lot of sentimental value that is attached to something like the dress that you got married in. Its an emotional keepsake to have with you forever, tucked away inside of a vaccuum sealed box that you can never open to look at, or expose to the light of day ever again once it gets professionally drycleaned. Your daughter may some day want to where that same dress. Okay...let's put you in that daughter's position. Let's be completely honest, and normal. Would you want to wear the 80's inspired turtleneck, full sleeved, puffy shouldered white wedding gown that your mom sported back in the day? Really? With that hook/loop like thing that's connected to the end of the sleeves where you put your middle finger through? Really? No. So sell it! There are tons of accredited popular used wedding dress websites out there for brides looking to sell or buy wedding dresses. Give the dress of your dreams to someone else for half the cost. Sure it has sentimental value, but its also got cash value.
2) Buy a used a dress. See above sentence. There are tons of pre owned dresses that people are looking to get rid of. By no means are they cheap, old, classless, or dirty. Most are expensive designer ones, almost half off or more, where the previous owner is looking to sell for the same reasons I mentioned earlier.
And in saying so, my favorite used wedding dress site is Pre-Owned Wedding Dresses. This by far is the most popular used wedding dress site out there. Tons of dresses from all designers, at all price ranges. Get rid of that negative used dress stigma. Its the smarter way to buy or sell.
The Final Decision
How do you know when you've found the dress? Well, most brides will say that when they knew, they just knew. Okaaaaay. Articulatively, that doesn't really help. Is 'articulatively' even a word? Doesn't matter. Again, this is just from my own experience. Never settle. If you ever get even the slightest inkling that you're not sure, or you might as well just get this damned dress because you're too tired of looking. Stop! Hammer time! Then walk away. The best thing to do is walk away from the situation. Don't ever feel like you have to settle for a dress. Love the dress. Try to picture yourself without the dress. Can you see yourself walking down the aisle in the dress? Feel 100% confident that is it truly the dress. When you're there in the moment, its extremely difficult to tell how you're actually feeling about the dress, so thats why its so important for you to take a breath elsewhere if you're confused, and unsure.
If you have that 'Say Yes to the Dress' moment, where you and everyone else starts crying its probably the one. Know your emotions, and know when to say 'no'. NEVER SETTLE. Settling will leave you having to fork out more money that you probably shouldn't spend on the dress that is actually the dress of your dreams, and also leave you stuck with a dress you can no longer stand. Nothing feels worse than realizing that you hate your wedding dress.
When you do find that dress, another very important pseudo step to follow is to STOP LOOKING! Erase all the photos you have in your 'Wedding Dresses' albums on your computer, and never browse through wedding dress sites ever again. That's it. You don't want to poke the bear, and start second guessing your decision. Stay confident, and feel confident.
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